One Last Year

Preschool or no preschool. That is the question.

I have struggled with this ever since Ladybug was two years old. Everyone said she was "ready" at two. So off we went to Mother's Day Out. I ended up teaching a class as well so we were there together. But it just didn't feel right. I felt that I could teach her just as well at home and I felt like she needed to be with me. So no preschool when she was three and Batman was one. We had a great year and just played and played. We had so many activities and outings that year that it will take me forever to scrapbook it.

But then she turned four and there it was again. She needs to go to school. It will be easier for her to transition into kindergarten. She needs the social interaction. It will be good for her. You need some time away. So off we went to four year old preschool. Now it was a good year. She still talks about her teachers and how much she loved them. Socially she loved it. Academically I had already taught her everything at home that they taught at school. But it was great review for her. Yes she was more than ready for kindergarten. But was it because she went to preschool?

Then times got tough with Nathan. You need to put him in school. It will do him good. You need some time away from him. So at 2 1/2 I put him in two days a week and he finished the year out. Then I left him in when he was three. Socially, he did good. He made friends and had fun. Academically he didn't learn much the first half of the year because of so many teacher changes in his class. The second half, he learned a little more. It was a great school and he loved his teachers but as he got older and matured a little (yep, I found boys mature a little older than girls) I started missing him. I started picking him up after lunch so he didn't spend so much time away from me.

Then in Spring of this year, the thought passed through my mind, I would like to keep him home for his last year of preschool.

Was I being selfish? Was I being sentimental? I am painfully aware that this is my last year with a baby at home and then it is school from here on out.

But he was already signed up for next year and Chris felt like he really needed to go.

Then we got transferred to Texas. I told them we would not be there and took him off the list. The house didn't sell. We were still here. So the questions kept coming, are you going to put him back in? I don't know, I will wait and see. I am going to let God decide that one. I finally decided to call to see if there was an open slot available. I got the answering machine. I missed her return call and then I put off calling for another week. When I finally did call, they were full.

It was almost a sigh of relief.

I was done stressing over it. Do I or don't I. Pros and Cons. What is best for him.

Well in my heart mommy is best for him.

I knew what to do. We home school this year and I am so excited about it. We have gotten up each day and done our school work. I have started planning activities around our days. We have started getting with other boys to play. He is moving fast through his work and learning fast. I am so excited to see how much we can learn this year alone.

Then when Chris asked how "school" was today for Batman, I told him what we had done and our lesson plan and how good he was doing. "Jamie, this time with you is really good for him," he said. That confirmed it. Whether I am being selfish for wanting my baby with me or sentimental because this is my last year at home with him doesn't matter. For this year, mommy is best.