Letting go

I am pretty controlling. I feel better about things when I am in charge and making the decisions and I have trouble relinquishing control over to others. My kids are one area I have always held tight control. It is as much circumstance as my inability to let go.

We have never lived near family for the kids to spend the night with or for someone to watch them if I ever wanted to do something. We do get a babysitter once every couple of months but it costs so much money that we don't do it to often. And a babysitter can't spend the night, so we could never stay out real late or take an overnight trip. So for six years, it has pretty much been Chris and I taking care of the kids.

Two years ago I left them with my mom for one night while we were in phoenix, and one year ago I actually left them for two nights and both times it was so my sister and I could have our spa getaway. Then I left them for one night last year when my sister got married and we went out for the bachelor party.

But in all this time, Chris and I have never gotten away together. Well, with him being gone since June and not seeing much of him I decided it was time we needed to get away.

So I was driving down Tyree Springs Road and I have no idea why it popped into my head but the thoughts started rolling and I begin to plan linguistics. How was I going to manage it.

But I did. After several phone calls and lots of airline searching and ticket pricing I booked our weekend away! Grandma Blake is flying in on a Thursday afternoon. We leave on Friday afternoon. We have three nights away and return on Monday afternoon. Then Grandma leaves on Tuesday.

We are going to stay in a grown up hotel, and do grown up things. I will have tickets for a Saturday night and a Sunday night "something" that even if the kids were with us, they couldn't go to. And the activities we have planned don't allow kids. (At least kids under 21.)

Now I am not saying where because even Chris doesn't know. All he knows is the which weekend and that he has to get on another plane. I have other surprises that might await him when we get there.

That being said, I am so excited. We really need some time away. When I mentioned it to the kids, they were so excited. Batman actually went out on the front porch to wait for Grandma Blake tonight, not understanding that he has a little while to wait!

But the control in me will come out. My control journal (yep, another fly lady thing) will be completely ready to go with all the pertinent information that she could possible need, with directions and times and dates, schedules, pick up and drop off times, appointments, emergency information, house information, food available..... etc.

But I am finally going to let go a little and I am so looking forward to it. I kind of wish I could go out front right now and wait for Grandma too.